Visiting The Ocean.....

Visiting the ocean is a place that always brings clarity of mind and a deep peacefulness. It's a place to ponder my life, to feel into my inner realm and to see if the path I am walking is true to myself. It gives me clarity of where I see myself going, of what I wish to bring forward with me into my tomorrows.

Having witnessed a few rather extreme bullying situations recently, not just in person but also here in blog land where cowardly individuals are posting vile comments without leaving their identity.

These anonymous people are the biggest cowards in my view. They wish to spread their hate without being strong enough to show their face. Instead they hide behind a screen of nothingness thinking that their twisted views need to be read by others yet they don't have the backbone to show their identity.

As for the normal bullies we all encounter from time to time, no explanations are needed,  these people are easy to spot and thrive on transferring their anger towards others. But sometimes a bully is a little more cunning, the passive aggressive bully, they work a completely different way. Some are so good at it that they can manipulate others into believing that they have never done anything wrong. They will have no problem constantly denying any wrong doings on their part and always will point the blame at others. Maybe they get a kick out of what they set in motion. It is why we really do need to remain alert to what we invite into our lives.

Social media in my view is a dangerous thing. I stepped away from it many years ago after seeing how destructive it was. From what I understand it has only got worse. 

This age we are in is a strange one, it is overrun with bullies and victims who both continually fling their accusations about instead of taking a long hard look at themselves and dealing with their own bullshit.

Blame is so popular now that people simply don't take responsibility for their own lives, for the choices they make or the situations they get themselves into and for how they feel.

The current new age trendy word for blaming someone else is triggered. She/he triggered me, therefore I retaliated. It's one big messed up game where people just keep blaming everyone else for how they are feeling. 

Sure we can be in a situation where someone might say or do something that prompts a response in us, but whatever the feeling that arises in us, it has nothing to do with what was said or done.  And it has everything to do with something you haven't dealt with in yourself. 

So there is no need to blame, it is a prompt to have an honest look within.

Instead of needing to have a "talk" or going on a verbal rampage on the internet, perhaps you might benefit more from taking some time out to look at why something/someone has annoyed/hurt you. 

But I guess that is not what these nasty bullies and the poor little me victims want, they get far more fulfillment in being angry or blaming everyone else for the state of their lives. These bullies/victims need to stop and actually take some time to look at themselves. And to realise that no one can make us feel anything, especially anger.

I know from my own experience, if I am angry it never has anything to do with anyone else, I might like to think that because it is so much easier to blame.

But when I delve deeper into why certain emotions come forth, it is always to do with me and some emotion that I had filed away and forgotten about, or for not listening to my intuition regarding a situation. Sometimes it is simply down to not speaking my truth.

Anger more often than not is felt because I have let myself down. Delving into your own shortcomings is not a pleasant journey. Because when you take responsibility for how you respond you will go through a period of berating yourself as you look at the behaviours and situations that lead you to these murky feelings swirling around within. 

Maybe it's time to question yourself?

If you feel that someone has ignored you, are you ignoring some aspect of yourself? Have you been ignoring your own self worth perhaps?

If you feel that someone has used you, perhaps you allowed yourself to be placed in the situation, again due to lack of self worth perhaps?

Maybe it is time to take control of your life back and stop blaming others?

Questioning the self prompts immense personal growth. 

And a sense of victory when you have bravely face who the real cause of these emotions are. 

You and you alone.

Because we can stop the blame game and take control.

 Maybe you need a bit of time out? 

Whatever change is necessary deep self reflection will offer the insights of what the real issue is and where the solution can be found. 

And despite what the bullies and poor me's like to think, blaming others for where we find ourselves is never an option.

The blame game needs to stop and responsibility taken for our own actions be they passive or aggressive. Ranting at another doesn't help you, nor does creating a drama or gossip from an interaction/situation you found yourself in. 

Take some time out, take the blinkers off and begin the journey within by looking deeply at the one that can really turn things around for you.

Yourself........