Friday, November 07, 2008

Sitting Here Pondering 'Me'

Sitting here pondering 'me', who is this me I call myself? Am I the body that moves before my eyes, hands that don't look like mine (even though they are) type away with words that come into my mind, but where do these words come from? Who inspires me? My soul, the essence of me that is more real to me than this body made up of skin, bones, organs and blood. Where did this body come from anyway? Who made it? My parents? Where did the first cells that merged together to become the miracle that I am truly come from? I often catch myself peering out of my body, not the 'me' that you see but the REAL me, the invisible one that resides deeply within my heart, that comes out to look at this world that I live in, to witness its self as a human-being....... Today was one such day, as I went about my day I was completely in the moment, I knew that my real self was joining me, seeing the glory that surrounded me as I went about my work. Feeling the texture of the soil as I filled the pots, noticing the patterns of the leaves as I lifted the plants ready to be planted in their new home. Seeing the miracle in the earthworms, the sand gropers, the butterflies and birds that join me in my life chapters every single day. Peering out into this world of mine I realised that I am moving deeper in to the inner world of mystery and amazement with every step that I take, that the 'normal' world that I am apart of holds no relevance to me, I feel like an extra going through the motions to appear 'normal' yet none of this feels right. I know that I am suppose to 'fit' in yet I don't want to, I want to be alone with my-self and uncover more of the inner I who eludes me at times. I come from the stars, I have known that since I was a child, my home was way up there amongst the clouds, that is where I wished to be, why was I so far away from home? I feel comfort in staring at the sun, its light illuminating the light that I AM, I feet connected and at peace, feeling the rays of loving light caressing my entire being. As I have grown and lived my life, the intrinsic knowledge within me has never ceased to call to me, to provoke a remembrance of what it was I was here to do................... And try as I might I cannot ignore it. I feel that the magic of the rainbow that hovers in the sky announcing the end of a shower is actually reminder of home. One that millions fail to see. I feel the love of the universe penetrating deep into my essence when I have my fortnightly sound therapy sessions, feeling the purity of the Universe weaving its way deeply into me, caressing my soul with vibrations of pure love a language that I recall from another time as each gong and bell sounds. Being on my journey and treading the path that I have chosen has been a difficult and challenging road, yet to do it any other way would have made me into another aspect of my-self, one that perhaps would not have awoken to the illusion of this earthy world. With every step I take towards my destiny I am unfolding more layers of the inner I, the true aspect of my self, and with each step comes a renewed awareness of the magnificence of life......................

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